If you’ve got an hour Dr. David Bush leads a workshop which looks at what depression can actually teach us. It also includes a set of questions to challenge irrational beliefs that are often the cause of a depressive episode.
Author: Joshua Lim
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Building Habits: Noticing Tension
I’ve noticed that I can be rather uptight and this expresses itself as tension in my physical body. And since I feel that tight muscles and shallow breathing don’t really help me much, I decided to do something about it.
It wasn’t anything fancy, I set the alarm on my phone to ring 4 times a day. That signaled me to do a quick check for muscle tension in my body and to simply relax. In fact, my alarm literally just rang again so if you’ll excuse me…
4 times a day for 7 days. If I can still do math that╬ô├ç├ûs 28 checksΓö¼├íthis week. I╬ô├ç├ûve learned that consistency of action is probably the biggest factor in building new habits for me, and I have noticed myself doing random spot-checks even without my alarm. So yay for me 🙂
IΓÇÖm going to let the alarms run for another week. 56 checks by next Sunday. Besides, who likes a tight ass?
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Where does it all start?
We all want to live a richer, fuller life. But where does it all start for you?
For me, it starts from getting goodΓö¼├ísleep. Getting enough of it. After a bout of insomnia that kept me awake until past 1am I committed to sleep by 11pm for 2 months. I didn’t always succeed but there was a noticeable difference: I felt more rested (duh!), more alert, more energetic, I got more done in the morning and it even felt I had more time in the morningΓö¼├í(I’d finish a few things and then realise it was only 10:30am).
It actually starts even before I put my head on the pillow at 11pm. I discovered I needed a pre-bedtime routine ofΓö¼├ípure “Me” time: no phones, no running errands for people, no social media. If you snuck a peek at me you╬ô├ç├ûd see me lying on my bed watching silly YouTube videos on my iPad. Some people have a ╬ô├ç┬úno electronics╬ô├ç┬Ñ policy before bed and I think that╬ô├ç├ûs a good idea but in this case my iPad isn╬ô├ç├ût getting in the way of my sleep.
Where does your New, Amazing Life start for you?
Photo of sleeping tiger is from Pandiyan licenced under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.0 Generic
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Discover your Core Values
Early lastΓö¼├ímonth I feltΓö¼├íI’d lost some direction in life and decided to get back in touch with my Values. That’s when I remembered I’d bought Tim Brownson’s Aligning with your Core Values some time back when it was on sale.Tim writes with an open frankness that never feelsΓö¼├íover-bearing or arrogant. He peppers his book with case studies and examples from his own experience as a Life Coach which makes what he presents relate-able and real.
By reading this book (and doing the exercises in it) you will walk away with an ordered list of your unique Values. And what do you do with said list? Well, it could help explain some of the frustrations you have in life particularly those that recur again and again. It could also help clarify your next step in life or a bigger picture of what you want to ultimately be up to in life.
Keep in mind that yourΓö¼├íValues can change over time. In fact, this was the second time I’d gone through these exercises to elicit my list of values. Here is my list as of May 2014:
- Trust
- Fun (tie with Harmony)
- Harmony (tie with Fun)
- Caring
- Integrity
- Conviction
- Dedication
- Prosperity
And here’s the list when I did it in September 2011:
- Trust
- Integrity
- Honesty
- Commitment
- Freedom
- Nurturing
- Authenticity
- Camaraderie
You will no doubt notice some parallels between both lists: Trust tops both, Integrity appears on each list and some words were changed but have the same underlying meaning (for example Commitment became Dedication while Nurturing became Caring). I am not so sure about Fun coming in at #2 because it coincided with the time I was consciously making sure I had more fun in life.
Remember how I said that Values can help explain some of the frustrations one encounters in life?Γö¼├íTrustΓö¼├íseems to be a particularly important value and recently some “friends” of mine did something that broke the Trust. Needless to say I was very upset and even lost sleep over it.
I wonder though, if Values can be used to explain experiences, could they also be used to justify them? One the one hand I can say that what my “friends” did hurt me because Trust is important to me (i.e. an Explanation). On the other hand I could easily use Trust as an excuse toΓö¼├íkeep myself a victim and continue being upset at my “friends” (i.e. a Justification). Just something to be wary of, I suppose.
Photo of heart is from epSos.de licenced under Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic